bismillah ...
---------------
I miss my silent heart
I miss my silent heart,
that focuses, deep in thought
that tells me the truth
when others lie
that shows me the proof
when others deny
that guides me and protects me
prevents me from wrong
that tells me and convinces me
that I’m fine the way I’m
I miss my silent heart
coz it has been very noisy
since it stepped into the real world
which is awfully, very busy
now it talks about things
unimportant, simple and easy,
to release me from tense
or feeling unhappy…
it thinks about life
short-termed with too much 'love'
so that I’ll dream
yet I’m all awake ..
it shows me wonders,
glittering splendours ...
it shows me colours,
worldly flavours ...
it shows me things,
too many of them ...
which I do not comprehend,
which I do not understand ...
it tells me very 'important' questions,
yet gives indefinite answers ...
it makes me perceive,
things I do not believe ...
it tells me to be 'me',
which is not what I am ...
it makes me 'me',
when my heart is noisy ...
'
cheerful' and 'too happy',
'mischievous',
'adventurous' and 'lively' …
when I am forgetful indeed,
forgetting, not taking heed ...
of what Allah commands in the Qur'an,
of what the Prophet preached,
things, that I should always bear in mind ...
I miss my silent heart,
now I worry about things
that I should not …
I miss my silent heart,
the Qur'an,
the dzikr,
the peaceful surrounding,
and my silent heart ...
I miss my silent heart
Allahumma ...
I seek YOUR forgiveness
I seek YOUR guidance of truth
I seek YOUR true love and bliss
show me YOUR way of peace
light and guide my life,
protect me from falling again
into the busy world ...
that speaks of the unreal,
that speaks of the untruth,
yet very, very appealing ..
coz it made my heart noisy,
and it made me lose 'me' ...
and I love my silent heart,
I can't stand being far apart ...
and miss my silent heart!
allahummaghfirli zunubii
allahumma tohhir qalbi
allahumma ab'idni min makriddunya
wa ma minha minasy syarri...
allahumma la taj'al fi qalbi,
hubban min gheyri hubbik ...
fala ana illa 'abdik,
wa ma ana bisyai-in illa bimardhatik,
faghfirli, warhamni ...
allahumma tohhir qalbi ….
alfaqeer ilallah,
khaleel el-wafy
201002
1.31 am
